Click here for today’s Mail on Sunday column, where I’m standing in for Suzanne Moore this week. There’s the woman who unmoored a Dartmouth passenger ferry, shouting, “I’m Jack Sparrow!” — before hitting a £70,000 catamaran. Gwyneth Paltrow and Cameron Diaz as Obama’s fund-raising marshmallow twins. The Litvinenko case six years on. And why I’m much more sorry than Nick Clegg could ever be. Sorry I ever voted for the Lib Dems.