Sunday
19
January
2014

A ban on affairs!

 

Writing in today’s Mail on Sunday about why people should never have affairs in the first place. 

“Is it unrealistic to suggest that people just shouldn’t have affairs? Really, is it that outlandish an idea, to just keep your pants on when you’re with someone who is not your partner? 

I am trying to avoid shouting here. Because it feels a bit like telling off a toddler. Don’t pick your nose. Don’t draw on the walls. No, you can’t have a fourth Frube. And no committing adultery. I have no sympathy. It’s childish. 

I am not talking from personal experience. Yet. Just keeping my husband of 14 years on his toes there. Only joking. Because the thing is, I would not have  an affair. Ever. And I know this. This is why I am married. 

If I wanted to have an affair, I would stop being married.”

Sorry to anyone who was hoping to have an affair with me. *sound of George Clooney wailing and gnashing his teeth*

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